Woops.

Hi! Welcome to my (apparently) bi-annual blog. Here's some facts about me and my last six months.

I like margherita pizzas, but am not a fan of most of the other varieties... I find them too busy.

I recently took out a new phone contract, and as a result won an xbox 360! Only it wasn't a competition, and I'm now paying through the nose for a contract that I didn't realise also involves paying for a games console. Hilariously I already have an xbox, so I've now got two. If you want to buy an xbox, get in touch. (It's really fun)

I'm still paying for my old phone contract, as the nice lady at O2 didn't cancel the contract. To add insult to (significant) financial injury, they send all letters addressed to "Mrs Calum King" which tell me I owe them a lot of money. Teehee! Gits.

Other than paying a phone company to cast aspersions on my gender, I'm also in the process of moving from Scotland, my safe haven away from all the stupidity of phone contracts, and rent, and the X Factor, and Britain's Got Talent, and London 2012, and bloody New Moon, so that's fun. I won't be on the island of Iona any more, but will be blogging (ha) from either Britain or Australia, depending on which side the coin lands.

I've also got 10,000 words to write for next week on three hilariously difficult philosophical conundrums. If anyone knows about Frege and his role in the history of Analytic Philosophy, do you want to be my friend? I won't be nice to you and will essentially use you for your brain... I hope that's ok.

On the bright side, I'm becoming really sarcastic and bitter, so hopefully I'll be able to release an excellent posthumous autobiography, when the time comes. I think I'll call it:

"You're all a bunch of bastards and I'm glad my grandson poisoned me."

Peace and Love,

Cal

Hullo, sorry for the long break, but I've been readjusting to life on the Isle of Iona, which is where I holiday. ...and live, when I'm not at university. It's a funny place, slightly hard to describe, but the community on the island involves a lot of young people, which means I'm able to join in and pester them. At the moment, I'm working in the community gift shop on the island, which sells tea towels, wooden crosses (it's a Holy island) and other assorted nicknacks. If you're running low on nicknacks, I'm your man.

Watching>>> Batman - Dark Knight, with my dad...at the moment. He's laughing incredulously at all of the explosions.

Doing>>> Volunteering full time in the shop, and spending most of my evenings in the pub.

Reading>>> Generation Kill, about the Iraq war and stuff, which is all topical. (if you live in 2003)

Photographical evidence that I've left the Abbey at least once this week>>>

Exams are done with now, which means (for those of you who want to keep score) I've only got 9 hours of official educational exams left. Unless I fail any, in which case I get to come back in August, with sunburn and a raffia donkey under my arm, and resit them.

You'd think that without the pressure of exams, I'd blossom, bloom into a cheerful, sunnily disposed individual, but luckily that wasn't the case, and I've just found different things to stress about. I leave uni this weekend, spend a week down in the south, then fly up to the island for as long as I can hack without running out of things to do and resorting to cannibalism.

Watching>>> (is >>> better than ///? I'll try it.) Arrested Development, season 1. If you've not seen it, it's the cleverest, funniest comedy I've seen.

Doing>>> Wandering around aimlessly, watching endless films and TV episodes.

Listening>>> French version of Robyn's Who's that Girl

Voting>>> Local and European elections... massive anti-climax after voting, sad in the knowledge that for my one vote, there were probably going to be double for mad parties.

Reading>>> Ross Kemp on Afghanistan. I know, but I surprisingly enjoyed the TV show, which involved Ross running after soldiers while getting shot at. He has a bit of a swagger, but I'm impressed by anyone who's up for going into a war-zone and not being allowed to have a gun. That said, the book feels like he just watched back the documentary and that was what jogged his memory... it feels a bit familiar.

Photographical (I know it's not a word, but I like it.) evidence that I've left the flat at least once this week>>>

I just finished Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone! Finally. I'm going to read Chamber of Secrets now, only I forgot to bring my copy of that particular tale to university, which might make reading it difficult.

Might just watch the film.

The fire alarm woke me up this morning, and along with about sixty bleary-eyed students, I stood outside my building complaining bitterly about being woken up so early. What kind of person gets up at 10am? Went back to bed for a few minutes before the alarm went off again. Process was repeated, this time with me wearing shoes. Then again.

Anyway, I finished my exams yesterday, so have completed my second year at Lancaster University of Witchcraft and Wizardry! One year left, a year of hastily making the most of it, trying to eat something other than peanut butter tortillas, and trying to get my head around my degree. A philosophy degree is basically like a degree in Sudoku... it passes the time and makes you feel clever, but everyone else thinks you're a dick and ultimately it leaves you feeling hollow and empty.

The fupping fire alarm's going off again. brb.

Doing>>> Finished my last 3 hour exam yesterday, bought Slumdog Millionaire, sat in the sun by the river for far too long and melted slightly.

Listening>>> The Dongle of Donald Trefusis, S-Fry's latest foray into the digital world.

Watching>>> Generation Kill, a really good HBO mini-series about the Iraq war, based on the book by Evan Wright.

Reading>>> Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. Honestly, I have like 5 pages left.

Annoyed by>>> The muthaflippin fire alarm, which we have taken to ignoring, and just hoping that it stops before we all burn to death.

S'nearly June

I don't get exams. I understand why exams are important at school, to keep kids from being happy and make sure they don't run around in the sunshine and overdose on Vitamin D, but at university I don't see the point. I do philosophy, which during term-time means pretending to read philosophy books, and writing mediocre essays to hand in at the end of each term... but at the end of each year, you have to write everything you're supposed to have learned in the year on a piece of paper in 3 hours, with no notes/books/toys, and that's apparently how to be a philosopher. You know, for people who're supposed to be clever, universities don't seem all that switched on.

Doing/// Went to see Eddie Izzard at the Lancaster theatre which was ace, except I got pins and needles in my fingers and thought I was having a stroke. Any thoughts?

Listening /// Hazards of Love - The Decemberists, Do You Like Rock Music? - British Sea Power

Watching /// Reaper, The Wire - Season 2

Reading /// Harry Potter 1. Yes, I know, still, but I've been reading it since Christmas. Like I said, I don't read, I just pretend to because people think it's clever. I probably should pretend to read adult books though...

Scared of /// The BNP, North Korea, David Cameron's forehead

Twitter/// Is stealing my soul. Something I never knew I needed, but now can't live without. Nothing puts your life in perspective like following an astronaut. Yeah, alright, Mark Polansky (@Astro_127) but I bought a donut from Greggs today, and it was YUMMY.

Photographical evidence I've been out of the flat at least once this week///

Micro-wicro-blogging

Sod off, blog. You thought you'd defeated me, didn't you? You thought that just because nobody ever visits, and you've had the same layout since 2007 that I'd give up. Don't deny it. Stupid blog.

Oh! Hello, I'm sorry you had to see that.

Welcome to Cal's blog FOURPOINTOH.

Listening/// The Gossip - Heavy Cross (born sweaty remix)

Doing/// Revising ano....anomo...aphonomalous...anomalous monism. It's going a bit shit, have to admit. My rhyming class is kicking arse tho... sadly that's only a half module.

Watching/// Doctor Who (season 2), Lethal Weapon 2, Kung Fu Panda (not 2)

Reading/// Harry Potter and Phil's Stone

Next Week/// Second philosophy exam. Goody.

Sneezing/// Regularly

Photographical evidence I've been out of the flat at least once this week///

Sunday.

Every year, about this time in May, I write about how I've got exams to revise for. Every Summer, since I was 13, I've had exams... Thinking about it, I've only got two more sets of exams left, this year and next year, and that's 3 exams each. 6 exams. At 3 hours each, that's... oh my maths is awful.
Three sixes are eighteen.... 18 hours of exams left in my schooling career, and hopefully I'll come out as a bachelor of the arts, which will probably mean I'm qualified to sell used cars and live in a bedsit.

Otherwise, life is OK. I'm sitting at my desk, looking out over a shimmering canal; sitting at the computer on a chair that's far too low down because I broke the other one.

As I get older, I find that things that used to seem so alien and grown up, are now tedious reality; bills, rent, browsing for the cheapest (organic, yah) bananas, contacting landlords about dripping taps... Luckily I'm still a massive child, and also I'm still young enough to go clubbing, which helps to dull the feeling that my life is a vapid waste of the world's precious resources.

Oh, and I bought a new boxset today, the Sopranos, season 1. So that's nice.

Oh! Hi there.

I want to make this a bit more like a normal blog, with things from my ACTUAL REAL LIFE included. So, here's a snapshot.

I'm a day away from a massive deadline, and the last two weeks have been spent in a sobbing heap in Lancaster University Library, finishing (and starting) three essays on subjects I don't understand.

From somewhere I seem to have found the 7500, that's SEVENTY FIVE HUNDRED words I needed. I'm not sure if they're in the right order, or even if they're the right words, but they'll do for now.

On Friday I hop on a train to Scotland at 9am, and should get to Iona in the evening. I can't wait... it's hardly the most busy place, but I love it... and the pub's just opened after being closed for the winter. Yay! I spent almost every night of last summer in that pub, and it was time well spent. At least, it probably was... I don't really remember.

So, stuff that I've got planned for this year and will be writing about is...(are?)...will be*:

• Exams in May
• End of Exams in June
• Sleeping for most of June
• Spending July and August on the island
• Going to the States in the Autumn (hopefully!)
• Beginning my third year
• Reforming Wham/ releasing Best of
  

Oh, and have a doodle of Godzilla.

I feel really lucky to live where I do... (outside of term time, anyway)

Island Christmas from mynameiscal on Vimeo.

Bah.

The thing about university is that often you forget that, obviously in the background, there's quite a lot of work to be done. It's something of a buzzkill.

So, for mid march, I have three 2,500 word philosophy essays to complete, a 3000 word critique of someone (from my creative writing class)'s dreary creative writing pieces from the year (stories about shoes, that kind of thing) and a 10,000 word portfolio.

So, in all, that's.... wait... something like 20,000 words. 20,000 words in 30 days comes out at about a word a day, so thankfully that should be fine. I don't really know what I was worrying about, really.

Today's word is "Hume."

Winter 09 from mynameiscal on Vimeo.
...Just in case you were wondering what I've been up to these last few months!